Off The Gridiron With Senior Melvin Williams
Nov 18, 2002 | Football
Nov. 18, 2002
by Trish O'Donnell, Kansas State Student Assistant
"I love you, Daddy."
No words could be more inspiring for senior Melvin Williams.
They inspire him to be a better football player, but most of all, to be a better father.Williams and his wife Beth have two children, five-year-old Caleb and two-year-old Jasmine. Williams proudly says they are the best kids in the world.
Beth brings the children to all of Williams' games so they can cheer their father on.
"My son is my biggest fan," Williams said. "He gets kind of confused about all the football players and their numbers, but he knows Daddy. He can always pick me out."
Williams' teammates are supportive of his family. He says they joke about him being in the fatherhood stage of life but they enjoy having Caleb and Jasmine around. The kids know senior Thomas Barnett, one of Williams' good friends, especially well.
"His kids are fun to be around," Barnett said. "Jasmine has one of those little toy ovens. I'll go over there and she'll make me something. I got to see Caleb ride his bike for the first time without training wheels. They're great kids."
Growing up in a single-parent home in St. Louis, Williams was dependent on his mother, Bertha. Growing up without a father, Williams wants to be the father he never had for Caleb and Jasmine.
Teaching the kids right from wrong is most important to Williams. He tries to discipline them in the right way and teach them responsibility.
"The other day Melvin and Caleb were painting an airplane shelf in Caleb's room," Beth said. "Caleb wanted to do it all by himself but he was really making a mess of it. So Melvin just sat him down and explained to him why he needed Daddy's help and why he needs to listen to Mommy and Daddy. He's more of the disciplinarian in the family, but the kids listen to him so it's good."
Caleb was born when Williams was just 17 years old. The original transition from everyday teenager to parent was difficult for Williams, but now it's just second nature.
"Ever since he's had kids and been married, Melvin has been more centered and more focused," Barnett said. "It gives him stability in his life. I think the guys on the team will listen to him more than other guys just because he's had so much experience in life. He's one of the bigger leaders on the team."
When Williams told his mother he was going to have a baby, Bertha told her son to focus on getting an education and that she would help out with Caleb.
"It's nice now that I'm graduating because I can spend more time with my kids instead of concentrating on school and football," Williams said.
Finding a balance between football and family life is a difficult task for this 6-foot-3, 270-pound defensive end. He hates to say that football is coming first because his family is more important, but especially considering it's Williams' last season with the Wildcats, he finds it tough to give each its due time.
"My wife understands that I have to spend a lot of time on the football field," Williams said. "But basically she just deals with it. She tells me to do what I have to do with football and then come home and spend time with her and the kids."
Since both Williams and his wife are taking classes, they worked out a schedule of who will care for the children. Williams says it works wonderfully. For example, Williams might bring Caleb and Jasmine to Vanier Football Complex while Beth is in class and he is working with the trainer. During practice time, the majority of the day, Beth cares for the kids, taking them shopping or to the park. She says it is difficult to find time for herself and to find time to do her schoolwork and that the kids miss their father during the day.
"Beth is a very strong woman," Williams said of his 24-year-old wife. "She is the backbone of our family and is very special to my heart."
Williams enjoys sharing the fun of parenthood with Beth. The younger Jasmine is now doing things Caleb used to do, which Williams says is a fun experience. He says he loves watching his children grow up and mature.
"I can't wait until Caleb starts playing sports," Williams said enthusiastically. "I want to be his biggest fan and let the tables turn. I'll be so proud of him."
As for Jasmine?
"She's my little princess," he says of his curly-haired daughter who loves to cuddle with her daddy. "She's my model. I want to get her in the girly things but with the rate she's going, she's going to be a tomboy."
Williams speaks nothing but praise for his children, calling them smart, sweet and amazing. He is tickled by the fact his two-year-old daughter can say her prayers at night and that both children use "sir" and "ma'am" on a regular basis.
"I get a kick out of seeing other people's kids compared to mine," Williams said. "My children are very disciplined. When other people tell me how good my kids are, that's one of the things I like about being a parent."
Another is knowing another person is dependent upon him and being a part of somebody's life.
"I never had that father-son bond," Williams said. "I'd like to give that back to my son."And in return, he'll get to hear "I love you, Daddy."
